How to be sexy without beeing tacky?
Depending of our mood, we dress to feel confident, to feel pretty, to feel good, to feel powerful, etc.
And sometimes, we dress to feel sexy, to seduce other men or women.
What is being sexy?
To answer that I’ll begin with what is NOT being sexy. At least to my eyes.
– to disguise your face and hide it under tons of makeup is not sexy.
– to disguise your breasts, using padded bras is not sexy
– to display your assets in a provocative way and let nothing left to imagination is not sexy
For me all the above enter the tacky category.
Being sexy is all about suggestion of your body.
It can be an oversize sweater that slides revealing a round shoulder, a delicate ankle between the pants and the shoes, a smooth walk on high heel, an hair jewel that makes you look at the back of a neck, perfect red lips on a bare face,
It is about being yourself and loving your body.
It is about the perception of others.
Some think that pixie make women look fabulous when other stand only for super long hair.
Some like sophisticated women wearing heels and red nails when others prefer innocent looking girls with wild hair and jeans.
So dress the way you feel is my best advice to be sexy. And don’t overcontrol.
Here are the things that I feel are sexy
1. Delicate fabrics
Ann Rhoney silk dress coming
Silk, cashmere, leather all are very sensual fabrics to me.
The silk glides on your skin and moves like fluid water around you when you walk.
The cashmere caress your skin making your outfit be as soft as you own skin.
The leather worn as a pants becomes your second skin. Removing super thin leather gloves can be mesmerizing.
2. Raw fabrics
The contrast between a rough material and a soft skin can also be very sexy.
Like with jeans, thick leather and used fabrics.
3. Dressing like a boy
Dressing like a boy is something that is often considered as very erotic in occidental culture.
Think Marlene Dietrich’s style, Saint Laurent’s smoking, and (smokin’ hot) Charlotte Rampling undressed in the Night porter, or men just loving when their girlfriends borrow their clothes (think of Sexfriends poster – yes the reference is not as classy as the previous ones ^^).
You can go for the total boyish style just like that, feminize it with accessories and make-up, or borrow only some pieces like derbies, men’s shirts, etc.
4. Dressing like a “femme fatale”
(As we just saw, a “femme fatale” can dress like a man…)
Her characteristic would be to act and dress in a way what is considered by our culture to be extremely womanly. Not girly, but grown-up strong woman who knows what she wants and is sure about her seduction power. In french, “fatale” means “deadly”.
In France, actress Fanny Ardant is the ultimate “femme fatale”, in the US, I’d say Angelina Jolie.
You can use only some of the “femme fatale” features in an outfit to make it more sexy.
Contrast is very interesting like raw jeans and a men’s shirt worn with Louboutin heels and a red pout.
5. Enlighten unexpected body parts
The clavicle: unbutton your shirt, wear a delicate gold chain.
The back of your neck: cut your hair, tie them but let some wild hair escape. In french we have a dedicated word for that body part “la nuque”.
The back: wear a reverse decolletage.
The shoulder: wear a V-neck cashmere, maybe it’ll slide. And it’s ok if we see your bra’s suspender as long as it is thin
Some skin somewhere: dare some cut open dresses that show some skin under the breasts
The wrist: roll up your top, decorate them with either super thin jewels or big ones. One only or plenty of them.
The top of the tights: it is considered to be one of the most erotic part of the body. Japanese even have a word for that: the “absolute zone” or Zettai Ryoiki. And the higher you cover your leg from the foot (either with socks or with over the knee boots), the sexiest this zone will appear. To bare it without going on the tacky side, prefer wearing very decent clothes on top. A chunky sweater with over the knee boots is perfect for instance.
You can also try “suspender look alike” tights with a very discreet outfit.
– The ankle: much thinner (and less hairy) than those of men, ankle are very feminine features. Set the focus on them with 7/8 pants. In winter you can add super thin socks.
Notice that the more you cover around, the more the body part stands out… and the more sexy it is.
If you wear a super mini super (too) tight dress, no one will notice your ankle, or your Zettai Ryoiki.
Doesn’t mean that tight black dress is a no. But that beeing sexy is all about balance. If you got the body, you can pull out the skin tight black dress, but forget about heavy make-up and stilettos.
It is also about the way you move, the way you talk and the way you act.
It is about you.
And you? Do you sometime dress to feel sexy? What are the things that you consider being sexy?